On my google home page, I have a quotes of the day section. I’ll post the ones that I like here. Most of the quotes are from The Quotations Page and some are collected from books, other types of media, and the people around me.
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Don’t you wish there were a knob on the TV to turn up the intelligence? There’s one marked ‘Brightness,’ but it doesn’t work.
– Gallagher
In these matters the only certainty is that nothing is certain.
- Pliny the Elder (23 AD – 79 AD)
A liberal is a person whose interests aren’t at stake at the moment.
– Willis Player
The first time I see a jogger smiling, I’ll consider it.
– Joan Rivers
I don’t hate myself enough to do track and field.
- One of my AP Microeconomics classmate
Genius may have its limitations, but stupidity is not thus handicapped.
– Elbert Hubbard
Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities. Truth isn’t.
– Mark Twain
Indecision may or may not be my problem.
– Jimmy Buffett
Originality is the fine art of remembering what you hear but forgetting where you heard it.
– Laurence J. Peter
Biography lends to death a new terror.
– Oscar Wilde
In the land of the blind, the one-eyed man is stoned to death.
– Joan D. Vinge
The world is round; it has no point.
– Adrienne E. Gusoff
Those who believe in telekinetics, raise my hand.
– Kurt Vonnegut
Without the aid of prejudice and custom I should not be able to find my way across the room.
– William Hazlitt
A friend is someone who will help you move. A real friend is someone who will help you move a body.
– Unknown
All the world’s a stage and most of us are desperately unrehearsed.
– Sean O’Casey
Procrastination is the art of keeping up with yesterday.
– Don Marquis
When a man is wrapped up in himself, he makes a pretty small package.
– John Ruskin
The only people who find what they are looking for in life are the fault finders.
– Foster’s Law
The point of quotations is that one can use another’s words to be insulting.
– Amanda Cross
Life is a zoo in a jungle.
– Peter De Vries
The more you find out about the world, the more opportunities there are to laugh at it.
– Bill Nye
A man’s silence is wonderful to listen to.
– Thomas Hardy
It’s amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day always just exactly fits the newspaper.
– Jerry Seinfeld
The first duty of a revolutionary is to get away with it.
– Abbie Hoffman
Consistency requires you to be as ignorant today as you were a year ago.
– Bernard Berenson
To believe is to know you believe, and to know you believe is not to believe.
– Jean-Paul Sartre
Sometimes the appropriate response to reality is to go insane.
– Philip K. Dick
In three words I can sum up everything I’ve learned about life: it goes on.
– Robert Frost
We are all apt to believe what the world believes about us.
– George Eliot
After one look at this planet any visitor from outer space would say “I want to see the manager.”
– William S. Burroughs
The future is here. It’s just not widely distributed yet.
– William Gibson
The best way to predict the future is to invent it.
– Alan Kay
The past is not dead. In fact, it’s not even past.
– William Faulkner
We are inclined to believe those whom we do not know because they have never deceived us.
– Samuel Johnson
Laws are like sausages. It’s better not to see them being made.
– Otto von Bismarck
To do just the opposite is also a form of imitation.
– Georg Christoph Lichtenberg
Walking isn’t a lost art: one must, by some means, get to the garage.
– Evan Esar
I tend to live in the past because most of my life is there.
– Herb Caen
Drive-in banks were established so most of the cars today could see their real owners.
– E. Joseph Cossman
We live in a Newtonian world of Einsteinian physics ruled by Frankenstein logic.
– David Russell
In times like these, it helps to recall that there have always been times like these.
– Paul Harvey
Mathematics, rightly viewed, possesses not only truth, but supreme beauty – a beauty cold and austere, like that of sculpture.
- Bertrand Russell
Gratitude is merely the secret hope of further favors.
– Francois de La Rochefoucauld
It was wonderful to find America, but it would have been more wonderful to miss it.
– Mark Twain
Some have been thought brave because they were afraid to run away.
– Thomas Fuller
A lot of people like snow. I find it to be an unnecessary freezing of water.
– Carl Reiner
The best minds are not in government. If any were, business would hire them away.
– Ronald Reagan
There are many who dare not kill themselves for fear of what the neighbors will say.
– Cyril Connolly
Each problem that I solved became a rule which served afterwards to solve other problems.
– Rene Descartes
The secret of being a bore is to tell everything.
– Voltaire
In my many years I have come to a conclusion that one useless man is a shame, two is a law firm, and three or more is a congress.
– John Adams
You must first have a lot of patience to learn to have patience.
– Stanislaw J. Lec
In mathematics you don’t understand things. You just get used to them.
– Johann von Neumann
The ability to delude yourself may be an important survival tool.
– Jane Wagner
Dance like it hurts,/ Love like you need money,/ Work when people are watching.
– Scott Adams
You’ve got to take the bitter with the sour.
– Samuel Goldwyn
Too many have dispensed with generosity in order to practice charity.
– Albert Camus
An adventure is only an inconvenience rightly considered. An inconvenience is an adventure wrongly considered.
– GK Chesterton
As I grow older , I regret to say that a detestable habit of thinking seems to be getting a hold of me.
– H. Rider Haggard
Prediction is very difficult, especially about the future.
– Niels Bohr
Everything in the world may be endured except continued prosperity.
– Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Give a man a fish, and he’ll eat for a day. Give a fish a man, and he’ll eat for weeks!
– Takayuki Ikkaku, Arisa Hosaka and Toshihiro Kawabata
Things are more like they are now than they have ever been.
– Gerald R. Ford
The trouble with being punctual is that nobody’s there to appreciate it.
– Franklin P. Jones
